This article is featured in The Age and is republished with permission.
Christmas is almost upon us and along with the bucket loads of prawns and tinsel comes the gentle reminder that some of us will be spending the day alone. For some, it’s a matter of choice, with more people choosing self-care over the stress of the day.
For others, however, marital break-ups, death, mental health issues and even the tyranny of distance can all result in people finding themselves unwillingly flying solo on December 25.
Australian Psychological Society chief executive Zena Burgess says the traditions associated with Christmas can make being alone harder for some.
“Many traditions include sharing a meal and participating in festivities as a group so it can be challenging for people to celebrate on their own,” she says. “Social media may also exacerbate this as people can see others celebrating with friends and family and this may contribute to feelings of loneliness or isolation.”
Whether you plan to treat it as a day like any other, you’re feeling the loss of family and friends at this time or you would simply prefer to be on your own, there are still plenty of ways to spend the day joyfully, mindfully and even productively.
Volunteer
In practical terms it’s a bit late to be offering to give up your time to help others. More charities are reporting an over supply of volunteers to serve Christmas lunches and, understandably, they tend to want to vet people in advance. If you’re really keen, think outside the box, such volunteering at places that are traditionally short-staffed during the holidays like nursing homes and animal shelters.
It is, however, a good one to keep in mind for next year, with the Australian Psychological Society noting that giving up your time to help others has significant mental health benefits.
“Individual acts of kindness release both endorphins and oxytocin [“feel-good hormones”] and create new neural connections in our brain, so volunteering your time at a local homeless service or charity is an excellent way to feel connected to your community,” she says.
Go nature bathing
With cooler temperatures forecast for both Sydney and Melbourne this Christmas Day, a walk in a natural setting could be just the ticket. Some parks may be closed on Christmas Day, so check in advance; however, there are still plenty of options that don’t require park entry. In Sydney, take one of several coastal walks and enjoy the harbour, river or ocean views, or try out the new inner west GreenWay linking Cooks River at Earlwood to Parramatta River at Iron Cove. If you’re still keen for a swim, avoid the Christmas Day backpackers at Bronte and Bondi and head to one of Sydney’s lesser known beaches or one of the many ocean baths the city is known for.
In Melbourne, coastal walks around Williamstown and Altona, the walk from Port Melbourne to St Kilda or something more formal like the grounds of Kings Domain with its lush Grotto waterfall are ideal for connecting with the natural world.
If you think you might be getting off the beaten track, do tell someone where you’re going, even if it’s your neighbour.
Get out of the house
Avoid the usual summer holiday crowds and head to some of the biggest attractions your city has to offer. Both Taronga and Melbourne zoos are open on Christmas Day as is Sea Life Sydney Aquarium. Enjoy the open air art gallery that is the Melbourne CBD, touring the likes of Hosier Lane without the distractions of selfie-seekers or take a self-guided tour of street art in Sydney. Having an itinerary is key, ensuring your day has direction.
If you’re not driving, be mindful of the public transport holiday timetable in your city. Nobody wants to be stuck with an Uber price surge when your train service fails to materialise.
Plan your day at home
For those experienced in spending Christmas Day alone, it can be a festival of self-care, from having control of the remote to indulging in time-consuming pastimes or discovering new pleasures. Plan ahead and choose your own adventure, whether it’s mastering the art of choux pastry, diving into a 1000-piece puzzle or watching (or re-watching) the complete series of Pride & Prejudice, Pluribus or whatever floats your boat.
Create a schedule, including meal times, to give the day structure and make it a celebration of one. Indeed, given Boxing Day leads into the weekend this year, you could plan a whole series of events over several days, ticking off activities as you go. The day is what you make it.
Make that call
Spending Christmas Day on your own truly is unavoidable if you’re far from home. Taking time differences into account, schedule a video call with loved ones. If we have learnt anything from COVID, it’s the knowledge that you can do almost anything via FaceTime or the like so make it festive with some pre-prepared games like Never Have I Ever or Trivial Pursuit.
Plan for 2026
It’s been a tough year for many but there’s generally something to be grateful for, even in dark times. Spend time reflecting on the good things of the past year and make plans for the new year – it’s only a week away. It could be as simple as writing down personal goals for the year, starting a journal or pulling together a mood board for a renovation. The day is yours to make of it what you will.
If being on your own for the day brings up negative feelings, be kind to yourself and reach out for support. Burgess says it’s quite normal at this time of year to feel lonely.
“We know that this time of year can be particularly difficult for many Australians, including young people,” she says.