This article is featured in Body+Soul and is republished with permission.
A bullied monkey clutching an IKEA toy probably wasn’t on your 2026 bingo card – and yet here we are. Somehow, his plushie has become the internet’s most relatable coping mechanism. Turns out, the urge to cuddle when life feels overwhelming isn’t random – it’s wired into us.
If you’ve been anywhere near TikTok lately, you’ve probably met Punch – the monkey that was getting bullied by the other monkeys at Japan’s Ichikawa Zoo, and given a stuffed IKEA plushie by staff for comfort.
Watching him clutch that little toy like his whole world depends on it has single-handedly gotten me through the week.
And it turns out Punch is onto something.
Because the impulse to reach for something soft when life feels hard isn’t just quirky monkey behaviour – it’s one of the most deeply wired human instincts.
Physical touch quiets the nervous system, softens the stress response, and tells the brain that everything is going to be OK.
And Punch is an icon for figuring that out with the help of an IKEA soft toy.
So what actually happens in the brain and body when we cuddle, and why does it feel so good?
Is ‘cuddle therapy’ actually a thing?
Technically, yes – there are practitioners who offer professional cuddling sessions.
But you don’t need to immediately book one to reap the benefits.
At its core, cuddle therapy is simply intentional, safe physical touch.
And according to Dr Zena Burgess, chief executive of the Australian Psychological Society, touch is far from frivolous.
“Studies have shown that physical touch is an important part of bond-building and emotional communication,” Dr Burgess says.
“Physical touch boosts oxytocin levels, promoting a greater sense of wellbeing.”
Oxytocin – often dubbed the ‘love hormone’ – promotes positive feelings, slows the heart rate and reduces stress and anxiety levels.
Why do we instinctively reach for a hug when we’re stressed?
Ever noticed that when life feels overwhelming, you suddenly want to be wrapped in a blanket, a hoodie or a bear hug?
Stress physiologist Heidi Horne explains that it’s not random.
“Humans are biologically wired for connection as a survival mechanism,” Horne says, adding that the brain reads safe physical contact as proof that we’re not under threat.
“Even though modern stress comes from emails and deadlines rather than danger, the body still looks for those ancient safety cues (closeness, warmth and reassurance) to calm the nervous system.”
Psychologist Jocelyn Brewer says when things feel socially tense or overstimulating, we grab whatever reliably soothes us, be that warmth, softness, closeness, familiar textures – yep, even a plush monkey from IKEA.
What actually happens in the body when we cuddle?
“When we receive a hug, our nerves send signals to the brain’s emotion-processing networks that prompt a range of neurochemical signals,” Dr Burgess says.
“Oxytocin is one of these neurochemicals and plays a significant role in social bonding.
“At the same time, the release of endorphins makes us feel pleasure and wellbeing.”
Horne adds that supportive touch activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which governs the body’s ‘rest and restore’ mode.
“This lowers cortisol, slows heart rate and blood pressure, and releases oxytocin, a hormone that counteracts stress chemistry,” the stress physiologist explains.
Brewer says supportive touch “is basically a body-level exhale”, which explains why a long hug can feel more effective than a 10-minute pep talk.
Can cuddling really help with anxiety and sleep?
Short answer: yes.
Dr Burgess says hugs can help us sleep by lowering cortisol levels, and reduce our reactivity to stress.
“Touch has also been linked to better physical and mental wellbeing, and research suggests it may reduce feelings of loneliness,” she adds.
Horne says many people think stress is purely mental, but it’s actually physiological first. “Physical connection gives the brain a shortcut to feeling safe, which is why touch can reduce anxiety faster than trying to think your way out of overwhelm,” she explains.
So if you’ve ever calmed down faster from a hug than from journalling, it’s literally biology.
How to incorporate cuddles into your day-to-day
Good news: You don’t need a romantic partner on standby.
Physical touch can be incorporated into daily life in small, low-pressure ways.
Dr Burgess suggests cuddling family members or loved ones, petting animals, or greeting friends with a hug – while noting the importance of consent.
“In relationships, that might look like a hand on someone’s back, offering a massage, running fingers through their hair, walking hand-in-hand or linking arms,” she says.
And if people-touch isn’t available?
Brewer suggests a ‘modern comfort menu’.
“Plush toys with textures, a self-hug, warm showers or a weighted blanket can mimic the vibe,” the psychologist says.
Horne recommends building what she calls ‘micro-moments of connection’ into your day, such as holding a hug for one slow breath instead of rushing it, sitting close to someone (or a pet) before sleep instead of scrolling, or pairing touch with a long exhale to strengthen the relaxation response.
“They (these moments) take under a minute, but they shift the body out of fight-or-flight and back into balance,” she explains.